Hollinger And Capper For Ibuprofen Unite!

3:51 am and I'm posting for class about Daniel Bell saying that we've just experienced the end of ideology? (see "The End of Ideology in the West," 1960)
3:52 am and georgia, ira, and james are doing (let me check) "almost true"?
3:53 am and the rumors are true?!
3:53 am but I want to change it to "I found a reason"?
3:54 am and you don't believe me when I say I'm writing these actually when the minutes change
3:55 am but I am.
3:55 am so that's why some of these have the same time at the beginning of them (see "3:53")
3:56 am thanks music hum, for teaching me about jazz and Miles Davis and Thelonius Monk and Bird and all of them, since they're insane

Why would I drink a red bull when:
a) I'm still pretty sure they haven't been approved by the fda
b) I didn't really have that much work to stay up for
c) I don't even like it
d) my heart's been hurting lately (not figuratively)
e) my heart's been hurting lately (figuratively)
f) it's just that I get so lonely and I honestly don't understand how everyone can have a girlfriend/wife/homosexual nature when it really doesn't seem like this is something that should be happening to me
g) especially when I just want to sleep a lot more
h) though I did sleep for ten and a half hours last night
i) from 11:30pm to 10am. Isn't that c r a z y ? It felt like sleeping just a normal amount.
j) IT WAS A PLEASURE THEN
k) COULD YOU JUST BE HERE AGAIN
l) I remember when I thought velvet underground was a new group that sounded old on purpose. It would be cooler that way, I think, because it proves that music can still be amazing. But now, I just expect that it would be great. It's from 1964, so of course it's great, a-duhhhh.
m) sorry, nico
n) I dyed my hair darker brown and when I got back to new york, I found out my suitemate dyed her hair the same color.
o) sounds crazy, no? But here in our little suite of PABAR, you might say that every one of us is a fiddler on the roof.
p) please come to our holiday party on Friday night.

There will be mistletoe.

He May Be A Rancher, But He Can't Honestly Say He's Ever Felt Jolly

OH LORDY I've accomplished so much today. It's because instead of writing my usual "Honey, Do!" list, I wrote a "Seriously, Do!" list.

Crossed out items include and are limited to:
1) edit Modern Temper paper, turn in
2) edit East Asian Civ paper, turn in
3) call guitar hero guy
4) activate new credit card
5) pay bills (by friday)
6) update netflix account

Yet to be crossed out items:
a) give carly that check for $60 for that v-guitar controller
b) send belated birthday card to my old english teacher's three-year-old daughter
c) get Winston to sign that one e-form

I should probably go get a physical pretty soon. And return these shitty earphones to radioshack. And clean up my room. I've been rereading old emails to clean out my inbox, and I found one from c. mason wells when he was in telluride, one from pat young asking me to assistant stage manage the varsity show freshman year, and one with this picture in it:

(that was my Calculus II professor!)

BARF BARF BARF,
aunt spotty dotty
(the dog)

Reconnaissant, Dankbar!

I forgot to say what I'm thankful for!

Thanks Very Much:
-sweaters
-Gabe the camry
-thanksgiving
-all my pals!
-naps
-having two big papers due on tuesday, since they'll both be over with at the same time and then I won't have to worry about anything until finals
-tv
-girl groups from the 1960s
-nice strangers
-guitar hero
-sam rockwell, paul rudd
-acrobatic repertoire with colin
-the "hifi buys" font
-late night with conan o'brien
-hearing "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" (the Andy Williams version) on my ipod's random shuffle tonight

HAPPY OFFICIAL BEGINNING OF CHRISTMASTIME, FOLKS!

Ric Ocasek Is Just A Little Worried Because Lisa Turtle Sprained Her Ankle Right Before The Dance-Off

HERE FOLLOWS A LIST OF CARS SONGS AND WHAT I THINK OF THEM:
(ps the internet unexpectedly quit before I posted this the first time, so you're looking at a second, less awesome version)

i) "My Best Friend's Girl" - my favorite Cars song pretty much because of the opening. And because I just found this video on youtube.

ii) "You Might Think I'm Crazy" - my second favorite Cars song because its video was one of the first videos I ever saw (the others being "November Rain" and "Mary Jane's Last Dance")

iii) "Bye Bye Love" - I don't remember what I had written about this one, but I definitely like it a lot. It shares its title with that Matthew Modine movie, which only makes me like it more.
(AND I SHOULD MENTION: the reason I didn't want to give "Grey's Anatomy" a chance at first is because of another Matthew Modine movie of the same name (the third and final Daphne Zuniga movie I can recall), which I liked very much and didn't want cheapened. Then I saw the show and changed my mind instantly.)

iv) "Just What I Needed" - good and whatever, but it's on some commercial that's been way overplayed.

v) "Let's Go" - ditto above

vi) "All Mixed Up" - the first version I heard of this was the Red House Painters cover, so it was hard for me to get used to the Cars version. Then it obviously smashed the cover's head in.

vii) "It's All I Can Do" - hated it for a while, then liked it

viii) "I'm In Touch With Your World" and "Don't Cha Stop" - haven't gotten used to these yet. Probably will like them later.

ix) "Moving In Stereo" - the first song on my "what happens when a sexy boy walks into a room" playlist (followed by "Sexy Boy" [air], "Don't Have To Be So Sad" [yo la tengo], "Venus in Furs" [velvet underground], and the foremost of all sexy-boys-walking-into-rooms songs: "When It's Over" [loverboy])

x) "You're All I've Got Tonight" - at first I was all, "where is this song even going?" Then I was all "OH MY GOD." Now I'm all "aaaahhhh 'cause you're all I got tonight!"

xi) "Drive" - I immediately hated that the Cars would have a song called "Drive," but then I started listening to it every time I drove home from babysitting. Sure, I'd cry a little. BUT DAMN IT IF I DIDN'T LEARN TO LOVE IT.

that's it. I like Ric Ocasek (and Benjamin Orr, Elliot Easton, Greg Hawkes, and David Robinson). And I like my car, Gabe.

HAPPY retroactive THANKSGIVING, EVERYBODY!

Unbelievable Coincidences

some crazy things are happening together-

a) Sam Rockwell (whom I love)'s birthday falls on November 5th (the day Doc Brown invented the flux capacitor) (which I love)

b) I didn't get the Conan internship on the same day that Amy Sedaris did guest star on Conan (last night)

c) I'm at home at the same time as Thanksgiving

d) Varsity Show callbacks were on the same day as my father's death anniversary

e) Borat and Casino Royale are both playing at Peachtree Corners 10

f) I needed new clothes just as I got home and found all these old great clothes I'd forgotten about

g) Jack McBrayer is from Georgia and that's where I am!

h) George Best looked sort of like Joe Namath











i) sort of

Make Me Frown Then Make Me Laugh

It's time to reiterate the list because YOU'VE BEEN PISSING ME OFF A LOT LATELY.

Pet Peeves! The Asshole 2006 Edition:
a) Party-game Cheaters. This has always been and always will be the most bastard thing a person can do (in my presence)
b) Elevator Button Pushers. If the Lobby button is already lit up, it doesn't have to get pushed again, even if the asshole who just got in the elevator needs to do something with his hands to look less awkward. And the door will close fast enough without said asshole pushing "door close." I pretty much hate anything that happens on an elevator, including elevator hooking up because it never involves me.
c) "Are You On The Way?" Calls. YES, I'M ON THE WAY.
d) Close Walkers & Pace Matchers. I hate close walkers because they make me feel like I'm being a slow-walker, which just isn't true, and if it were true, I'd most definitely be scooted over to one side of the hall/sidewalk so that regular-walkers can pass by me. And what makes close walkers worse is when they match your walking pace so that you can't tell if that's your pants making noise or theirs. And then when you try to vary your pace to get some answers, they find a way to match your pace again, and you're stuck in close-walking psychological hell until they peel off into their suite/city block.
e) When You Really Need Milk And There Isn't Any.
f) Rude on the Phone. If there's anything my internship has taught me (other than Steal! Steal all you can!), it's that there's no reason to be rude on the phone. Nobody is ever in such a frenzied bind that he has to be sassy about repeating his last name or explaining where he's calling from. And if you ever are in such a state that you feel you have to bitch out the poor lady who has to answer the goddamn phones all day, be prepared to be referred to "Fat Bitch Terry from BBDO" for the rest of my internship duration.
g) People Who Make Out In Front Of The Really Nice Fountain At Lincoln Center In Front Of The Opera House. Please don't ruin the only physical manifestation of Moonstruck that I have.
h) Most Models of the Ear Bud. Just because they usually don't fit in my ear and returning them to radioshack is always a pain in the ass.


But now that you know what my pet peeves are, you should also know what makes me happy. That way, you won't think I'm a curmudgeonly baby-bitch. Instead, you might be surprised to find I'm a well-rounded, 21st century type of gal with spot-on self knowledge and outrageous list-making capabilities.

Loves It 2006:
a) When You Really Expect Somebody To Be Rude and then He Is Totally Nice/Polite/At Least Funny. Isn't that a great surprise? Thanks for holding the door for me when I have groceries, shaved-head basketball guy!
b) When You Expect Somebody To Be Nice/Polite/At Least Funny and then He Is! It's great to be right.
c) Impromptu Presents/ Presents For No Reason. Because it means that somebody not only thinks about you when you're not around but also buys you stuff you might like.
d) Couples Who Switch Glasses When They Take Walks Together. One more reason I wish I needed glasses.
e) When Pen Ink Looks Really Nice On Paper. Because it makes me feel like I could be filming my hand writing something on a sheet of paper and it would be so, so pleasing to watch.
f) Yellow Lined Paper.
g) Tiny Little Babies Who Can Walk But Are Still So Small. wearing parkas, preferably.
h) Getting the Mezzanine at 1020. No one else at 1020 deserves that damn mezzanine.
i) Guitar Hero.
j) Big Plans to Take a Rain Walk. Reminds me of when I was very young and very happy.

THERE YOU GO.

So far my Christmas list consists of Guitar Hero II and a cookbook.

John Updike Always Sayin' Trust Me!

I could go do a personality study at the Behavioral Research Lab, but I would really rather go out clothes-shopping. I've already been food-shopping today because I had to get things to make my suitemate Ryan's birthday cake out of.

you: What kind of cake was it?
me: a Pancake Cake!

you: this might sound dumb, but what's a Pancake Cake?
me: Au contraire, it doesn't sound dumb because I made it up a few days ago. You see, what I did was I took the fact that pancakes are just cakes made in a pan instead of the oven, and then I took that fact and turned it into several layers of one cake with nutella in between. It looks like a short stack, only it's not short at all and the pancakes are cake-sized, not silver-dollar-sized. I was planning on putting a lot of maple syrup on it as frosting, or maybe mixing maple syrup into powdered sugar for a glaze, but my suitemate Amanda said just to use nutella.

you: so you did?
me: so I did.

you: and you're about to take your second trip out for the day? What about school?
me: FALLECTION DAY BREAK! I haven't had class since thursday!

you: but what I really wanted to know is how you're dealing with Neil Patrick Harris's recent outing.
me: He's gay. He's doogie. I don't know what we're going to tell Wanda, but everything else is just fine with me. I do wonder how I didn't realize it sooner, though.

you: Probably because you don't have gaydar and never have.
me: Probably.

you: Is that why at one point in your precious life, you had kissed more gays than straights?
me: I wish it were.

you: VOTE IF YOU GOTTA
me: I fell asleep on the futon last night!!

here's a song I just got: Magnet & Steel.
Oh, oh my.

Pretend It's Still November Fifth

Because that would mean that fifty-one years ago today, time travel was invented.

Furthermore, I just got back from three days at Junek's lakehouse and boy does my liver hurt. I'm way too tired to be writing one of these.

Remember when the tired ones used to be the best ones? We're in a slump.

Pretend it's still November fifth.

Katherine Was Just Thinking About My Pajamas

OH MAN I just wrote this post for my intellectual history class about Sidney Hook's "Communism without Dogmas" and not only did it:
a) make me realize that I don't know what the fuck anything is about anymore
but it also:
b) shot me back into my first memory of Ken Connor, when he yelled at Katherine in the hall about why communism wouldn't work while I pretended to be drinking from the water fountain for seriously ten minutes or so. And it was gross because that was the fountain where the water came out white because of...calcium?

Oh man, this is on-par with the trash salad!

Last night I fell asleep watching Overnight Delivery, which I purchased for myself off my own amazon wishlist last week. She has brown hair in it, guys. Brown hair like mine! AAAAAAAAAAA!

But what's your favorite part of it, Becky? I'll let you guess. Seriously, I want you to guess. Because you'll probably guess it. What could be Becky's favorite part of it? hmmm, think think think. It's probably not Paul Rudd playing a character named "Wyatt." Nah, that's too simple. Is that really what it is? Couldn't be! BUT IT IS. IT IS MY FAVORITE PART.

They're filming something outside school today and I thought it would be something cool, since the trailer doors say "Lucy" and "Desi" on them, but it turns out they're just filming an episode of "6 Degrees" or "The Nin9" or something. Lame, guys. I'd rather have August Rush come back than have to deal with them filming a tv show that isn't even SVU. Where's Chris Meloni when I need him (ie all the time)?

Where is he?

CELEBRITY JEOPARDY IN THE NEXT FEW WEEKS, THAT'S WHERE!

Chris Meloni on Celebrity Jeopardy: What more could a girl ask?